


wherever we go, it'll be heaven

by jungdok



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-22
Updated: 2018-07-22
Packaged: 2019-06-14 14:07:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15390417
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jungdok/pseuds/jungdok
Summary: The silence between them is so fragile it feels like if it breaks, it will break something in them as well.First love, Shiro thinks. That must be it. The bigger word for all of this. The beginning, the fall out, and finally, the end.





	wherever we go, it'll be heaven

**Author's Note:**

> Title is a lyric from the English translation of EXO's song Angel.
> 
> come chat on tumblr @takashgane

The silence between them is so fragile it feels like if it breaks, it will break something in them as well.

 _First love_ , Shiro thinks. That must be it. The bigger word for all of this. The beginning, the fall out, and finally, the end. Shiro wishes they would have chosen another spot to do this, instead of the Garrison’s cafeteria. The morning lull does grant them sort of privacy as many people aren’t awake yet, but those who are, cast glances their way, whispering amongst themselves.

And yet there is an odd sense of finality to speaking in a public place, like there really aren’t any loose threads. A clean cut, so to speak. _No hard feelings_. Shiro makes himself relax into his chair. He doesn't want to fight.

Shiro watches Adam watching him, studying him. Assessing the similarities and the differences. Adam’s hair is shorter now, slicked back like a true military man. His mouth seems set in a permanent hard line and brows in a permanent furrow, so unlike the bright, charming guy Shiro had fallen in love with all those years ago.

He thinks about how different they both are, knows Adam to have changed drastically from the way he holds himself alone. Knows he himself has changed, in more ways than one. Knows they wouldn’t fit together anymore, not at all. It already feels like they’re clashing, both of them holding back. What it is, Shiro isn’t sure. Years of pent up anger and resentment in the form of knife sharp words, perhaps.

Adam finally sighs pats at the pockets of his coat, then his pants. He pulls out something small and black and puts it on the table between them. It’s a black velvet box and inside it holds a sleek, platinum engagement ring with three, miniscule diamonds, for the orion’s belt. Adam’s favourite constellation. Beautiful in its simplicity. _A safe choice_ , Shiro had called it.

Shiro knows this because he bought the ring, proposed with it a year before he was chosen for the Kerberos mission. It was so long ago, a lifetime ago, that it doesn’t feel tangible anymore and the memory almost doesn’t feel his own. He was so different then. Hopeful. Young. _Naive_. So many things he isn’t anymore.

“I wanted to give this back to you. I never had the chance to return it”, Adam mutters and his hand lingers on the velvet box before he pushes it towards Shiro, pulling back his hand in an abrupt movement like the tiny box had burned him.

Shiro puts the box in his pocket. “Thank you”, he says.

Adam nods. “Maybe you can give it to someone who deserves it”, he says with a somber smile.

Shiro pauses. “Maybe”, he finally says and there is one raven haired beauty who comes to his mind when he thinks about proposing and marriage. Perhaps he still is hopeful, after all. Not this ring though. Adam could have kept it, Shiro wouldn’t have minded. The ring had been the last thing on his mind.

Adam tilts his head, carefully studying Shiro again. He used to say how Shiro was open like a book, so easy to read. Shiro doubts that applies anymore and thinks he’s right when Adam sits back, brows slightly creased into a careful, confused frown.

“Maybe there already is someone?” Adam asks.

Shiro twists in his seat, feeling like there’s an itch in his neck and scratches it. “We don’t have to talk about this…” he says and he means it. What’s between him and Keith is so _new_ , and the wound between him and Adam is still so tender and raw from the act of tearing it open again, no matter how careful it has been. It still feels like a sort of pain in him, throbbing and alive.

Adam waves his hand. “Shiro, I’d like to be your friend. I’d like to support you as your friend, like I couldn’t as your lover”, he says and he seems determined. Shiro sighs and doesn’t comment on this determination. He would like to stay on amicable terms with Adam, but a friend… It’s too early to say yet.

Maybe in the future.

“It’s… new”, he allows himself to say and Adam nods, leaning back in his seat, seemingly noticing Shiro’s disinterest on expanding the subject.

“I spoke with Keith briefly yesterday. He’s grown a lot”, Adam says instead. “He’s a great kid”, he adds and then lets out a little laugh. “Well, a man, now. His adoration for you hasn’t wavered at all.”

Shiro smiles to himself, his chest swelling with warmth, love and pride. ”He’s been through a lot because of me”, he’s fond when he says it but there is the pang of guilt he feels everytime he touches the topic. Keith’s been through too much with him. Things no one should ever have to through because of another person.

Adam hums. ”Your adventures must have been something. I’d like to hear about them, perhaps another time?” he asks carefully.

Shiro gives him a small smile. ”Another time.”

 

•

 

When Shiro gets back to their rooms, Keith is in the process of towelling his hair, having taken a shower in his absence, the shoulders of his shirt are wet from the water dripping in his hair. His cheeks are slightly red, either from training or the heat of the shower, and he looks ethereal dressed in his simple outfit of soft cotton pants and a basic tee.

Keith smiles in surprise when he sees him, eyes twinkling in the light streaming in from the windows and Shiro’s heart _stops_.

“Hey”, Keith greets, letting the towel drop around his shoulders. “I wasn’t expecting you back... So soon. How did it go?” there’s only the slightest waver in his voice as he says this, the way he chews his lower lip a tell tale sign of nervousness.

“It was alright”, Shiro says. “We spoke. He gave me back the ring”, he fishes the velvet box from his pocket and absentmindedly tosses it on the table. It’s not important anymore. It feels like any other object, holding no significance to him. He doesn’t even know what he should do with it. Sell it? He wishes Adam would have just kept it. It’s a beautiful ring.

Keith swallows. “Oh? So…” he glances at the box on the table and then back to Shiro, shyly watching him from under his lashes. He fiddles with the loose threads at the end of his towel. “You’re not back… Together? With Adam?” he coughs awkwardly, looking away as if in shame. The pink of his cheeks deepens.

Shiro’s brows shoot up. He hadn’t even entertained the thought of getting back together with Adam, his first thoughts had been exactly why they wouldn’t, and shouldn’t, get back together anymore. And for Keith to even think…

Shiro walks to Keith, the tips of their toes touching. “No, Keith”, he says, shaking his head. He reaches for Keith’s waist and Keith comes, pliant, leaning into Shiro’s chest. “Did you… Really think that I would? Did you let me walk out this morning, expecting me to come back and… Be with Adam again?” Shiro asks, disbelief written all over his voice. Keith, his Keith, his kind and loving and strong Keith, couldn’t possibly think that Shiro would ever leave him.

After everything they’ve been through, together and apart. They’ve always found their way back to each other, only to come apart _now?_ For the most ridiculous reason? Shiro can’t wrap his head around it.

“I just want you to be happy, Shiro”, Keith whispers, not looking Shiro in the eye.

“I am happy”, Shiro insists. “How could I not be?”

“You’ve been through so much, you _died_ , and the war isn’t over yet and… With me there’s always going to be something. And if you just wanted something normal, I would understand.”

“Keith, do you want something normal?” Shiro whispers, his thumb tracing Keith’s cheekbone now, and Keith finally looks up at him.

“No”, he replies, voice barely audible. “You’re all that I want. No matter what will follow.”

Shiro smiles then, leaning their foreheads together. Keith’s eyes flutter close at the touch, a shaky breath escaping his lips.

“I feel the same”, Shiro says, voice just as low. Anything louder would feel like violence in this moment, this tender moment between just the two of them, as life goes on outside the door and it feels like comfort. Feels like home, right here.

“After what I’ve seen, what we’ve both seen, I couldn’t settle for just normal anymore”, Shiro adds. Keith turns his head to bury it into Shiro’s neck, his fingers gripping Shiro’s waist. His body trembles against his. “I died but _you_ found me. I’m here because of you.”

Keith chuckles into Shiro’s neck and it’s a wet sound. “Give Allura some credit.”

“I do and I thank her. But you never gave up on me”, he pulls back then, needing to see Keith’s face. “And I won’t give up on you. Ever.”

Shiro wipes away the tears falling down Keith’s cheeks with his thumb, pressing soft kisses into his cheekbones, his forehead, the tip of his nose.

“You”, he breathes when his lips come to hover above Keith’s. It’s _new_ but he needs to say it, having never been so sure of anything in his life. Something he has known for a while. Keith stills, like he’s afraid to breathe, and presses even closer and Shiro makes room for him.

“You are the love of my life, this life which you’ve given me. Of all my lives.”

His life comes apart and comes together all in one when Keith kisses him, gripping him impossibly tight, equal measures passion and desperation and Shiro lets him, moves in sync with him, relishes in it. His heart hammers against his chest, answering to Keith like he’s a siren call and it’s desperate to drown in him.

Shiro wants him _closer, closer, closer._

“And you are mine”, Keith whispers.

“ _The only one._ ”


End file.
